Forgive yourself for the big things... but also the little things...
Don't beat yourself up for things you can't control... or even things that you could have. What's done is done and you gotta let it go.. people beat themselves up way too much.. some people do it out loud.
Notice all the times you beat yourself up during the day.. notice when those self critical thoughts come and say "you shoulda done this, or that..or said this or that...you big dummy." Would you say half these things to others? ..or be so critical of them in the first place?
Realize that this is creating a relationship with yourself.. This relationship is remembered, and becomes the template for your Self identity. This will shape interactions with others and yourself. It is up to each of us to change that relationship from negative to positive, no one else can do it for you.
Always do your best, and begin treating yourself with kindness, in each and every moment. Catch the negative dialogue before it begins, and change it to one of acceptance, love and kindness.
Become your own best advocate and partner.
This is also the only way to truly be kind to others.
PS> if you are around someone that is constantly critical and negative, notice that they can only do it with your permission. Many times they do this to control you, and also to have a punching bag for their own self-developed sense of inadequacy. Start accepting yourself anyway, and notice what happens. Odds are that they will either change, or leave.
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Just a personal note: There is nothing new under the sun. I am just attempting to present info. here that has helped me. I hope to present it in a clear way based on my experience with anxiety which was a spiritual, psychological and emotional awakening for me. In retrospect of this experience I have been reading as much as I could to come to a deeper and more grounded understanding of this seemingly mystical thing that happened to me (so that I could share it with you). I'm not a doctor or a scientist. Please know this is only my experience. Yours will obviously be different, but since my experience was so similar to others I've talked to, I am hoping this may be helpful or useful to you in some way. It's also a way that I hope to share the love with you. That is my purpose here.